This passage comes from the chapter “Counting the Cost”:
“Imagine yourself as a living
house. God comes in to rebuild that house. At first, perhaps, you can
understand what He is doing. He is getting the drains right and stopping the
leaks in the roof and so on: you knew that those jobs needed doing and so you
are not surprised. But presently he starts knocking the house about in a way
that hurts abominably and does not seem to make sense. What on earth is He up
to? The explanation is that He is building quite a different house from the one
you thought of- throwing out a new wing here, putting on an extra floor there,
running up towers, making courtyards. You thought you were going to be made into
a decent little cottage: but He is building a palace. He intends to come and
live in it Himself” (205).
I feel
like this analogy goes a long with something that C. S. Lewis talked about in
another part of Mere Christianity. In
a paraphrase, Lewis made a point that when you ask God to help you change one
little part of your life, He begins doing things that you do not want Him
doing. This analogy really brings that statement to a whole new meaning. You
ask God for help and He starts to rip your life a part and it is scary and it
also really hurts during the process because you were not ready for Him to “start
knocking [your] house” down.
I
really do feel as if this really applies to my life, and it makes so much sense
to me. At one point in my life, I felt as though I was completely broken and I
had no idea what to do to get out of my situation. I was at the point where I
was too helpless to get out of the situation myself. All of a sudden, God put
me in a situation that threw a car through my house. I was in so much trouble
and it hurt me deeply, and I don’t think many people realized how deeply it cut
me. It didn’t hurt because I got caught, it hurt because I had done something
so wrong and I knew it and now I had to live with the disappointment that I had
caused. To be honest, I am thankful that I was caught because it was something
that needed to happen, but at the time, my house was completely destroyed and I
was just thinking “What the heck am I going to do?” I wanted God to help me get
out of my situation, but not do things that He was doing.
As the
weeks and months went on, little things kept happening and changing and my
house was getting demolished into tinier and tinier pieces and it kept hurting.
Then after a few months, things started getting built in a way that was better
and healthier for me. I started to realize that what had happened, had happened
for a reason and amazing things were starting to come into my life. I cannot be
more thankful for what God did.
Although
I am trying to let God work, it is difficult to let Him do it and I am still an
extremely broken house. Things are still
happening and they still suck, but this analogy helps remind me of the good things
that have happened from letting God knock down parts of my house. It just
reminds me that I am a crappy carpenter and that God knows what He is doing. I
just have to remind myself to fight the part that is fighting back against the
things He wants.
I love the quote you chose, Bryce. It definitely is an accurate reflection of our lives, but furthermore, I felt a deeper sense of understanding when you paired this quote with your own story. We are all works in progress, and though we don't always understand why God does what he does, we can trust that the house he builds will be stronger than the shack we lived in before.
ReplyDeleteAlso, I really appreciate your willingness to share. You are voicing so many things that the some of us may not be willing to admit their existence in our lives, and I know that I personally have learned so much from your words, as well as being encouraged to share myself. Thank you for that, Bryce.
This is really great Bryce!! We actually wrote about that same quote. It is really great that you were able to come to that point in your life that you could see that your house needed repair and that, without first being destroyed, no true change could come about.
ReplyDeleteI love you so much girl and am praying for you continually!! Know that I am always here for you!!
Oh Bryce, you wonderful muffin. We have been best friends for a long time now (almost 7 years!), and during that time I have definitely seen God work in your life. I know it has been far from easy, and it never will be I suppose, but I know that God will do something fantastic with you. I have always admired your strength of both faith and character, even if you can't see it. I love you buddy! <3
ReplyDeleteI hope you know what a bright little lantern you are Bryce. You're one of the bravest people I know! YOU are a living testament to the beauty that can come from brokenness. And we can't transform the way He asks us to UNTIL we realize we need help with all our broken pieces.
ReplyDeleteI continue to appreciate your transparency, and I hope you take Rachel's words to heart: you are enabling others to be real as well.
Love!
15/15
This is an awesome quote that you gathered! I love it!
ReplyDeleteI know that you have gone through some definite rough times within your life, Bryce. I'm sure you have heard the same thing over and over, God is just trying to prepare you for something better, something greater. It becomes almost sickening to hear. You feel like all of the leaks and cracks in this house are supposed to get better but you feel almost trapped inside a broken framework. And I know all of these issues will eventually resolve, but as humans, we have no sense of the kind of patience that God has. A thousand years for him is a day to us. So I understand the pain in waiting for things to get brighter, for some of the leaks to be patched.
All I can say, that doesn't sound like some Sunday School answer, is that you can do it. You have pushed through a lot already, so why not push through it all? I know what it feels like when someone just gives up. It's heartbreaking and it makes everyone feel like they could have done something, anything to help you out.
But girl, you know how to work it. You are one truly amazing and inspirational girl. If you can make it through everything that you have, that means I will make it through late nights of homework and studying. That doesn't at all compare to what you have had to deal with! You are AWESOME (: